This is how I will crash
This is how I will crash all by myself
This is how I will not call you
This is how I do not set my hope in collaboration
This is where I learn I cannot buy myself flowers
This is where I go silent
This is where I disappoint my friends
This is where I fire my friends

This is where I get it confused
This is where I think that you don’t love me because you also want to get paid
This is where I think I lose you if I run out of money
This is where I think if I cannot do you properly
-this is where I lose my breath –
then I will lose you
the work 
the friend 
the ominous past

This is where I hold my own hand
This is where I realize I  cannot hold my own hand
This is where I need your enthusiasm
This is where I need it simpler
go watch me I put on a song and I will dance for you
you need to love it love it
be my crowd

This is where my body is my work my pride
This is where if I talk to myself for hours 
I will lose it so stay with me
This is about me losing it
This is about me